Tuesday, September 21, 2010
You can't choose not to signal
Thinking about signaling behavior is extremely depressing. It's bad enough to realize that so much of human behavior and beliefs have different purposes than the face value. What's worse is that it's very hard to find someone you can share your thoughts with. Taking our beliefs and behaviors at face value (especially those beliefs and behaviors that we consider "noble") is a very strong social norm, and there's a good reason for it. A lot of our behavioral norms serve to sort people into those that can be trusted to reciprocate if you do them a favor and those that cannot, and self-deception about those norms is part of how the sorting is done. This means that if you question, or even analyze those norms, most people that you choose to talk to about it will react with distrust or even outright hostility. They'll figure you for someone who's likely to shirk from their social responsibilities, and think that all your elaborate talk about signaling behavior is simply a way for you to rationalize your own selfishness.
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ReplyDeleteI think this happens partly because they assume that all actions are intentional, most likely because they want to believe in the idea that they control their decisions and thoughts. When you take that away from people, they get very suspicious about what you and don't like it.
ReplyDeleteI think you're right, that is part of the reason for the distrust. There's also another part, one that I think is quite legitimate. When I'm telling someone that their behaviors have hidden purposes that they're not aware of, it's perfectly reasonable for them to ask: How come you can see all those hidden things no one else can? What makes you so special?
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